i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
