Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
