I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
