By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
