Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
high people should be assigned attendants
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
