are you so shy because you have an std?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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