I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
