They have a pepper shaker for pot.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
