Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize
