no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize