At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
