sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I just want nice things and good sex
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
