Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
