You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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