it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
