ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
