i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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