Where are you?
In a non slutty way
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Mom said you looked used
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
