He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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