hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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