I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
