No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
