dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
