Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
