oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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