Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
