Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
