I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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