Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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