i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
