Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
