direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize