BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
