these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize
