If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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