He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
