"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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