She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I just googled if crying burns calories
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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