I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I have feelings that need drinking.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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