ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
