a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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