I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
