i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Holy shit dude........stairs
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
