I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
