there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
