So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
