I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
