his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
