I heard we made out
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
