I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize