evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
