I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
