That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
